What a pun!

I've decided to marry a pencil.

I can't wait to introduce my parents to my bride 2B.

Merton on the comforts of the Bible

There is, in a word, nothing comfortable about the Bible - until we manage to get so used to it that we make it comfortable for ourselves. But then we are perhaps too used to it and too at home in it. Let us not be too sure we know the Bible ... just because we have learned not to have problems with it. Have we perhaps learned ... not to really pay attention to it? Have we ceased to question the book and be questioned by it?
- Thomas Merton
from his book Opening the Bible
as quoted on God's Politics

The makem and the geordie

A makem (man from Sunderland) applied for a job at a factory in his home town. A geordie (man from Newcastle) applied for the same job and since both applicants had similar qualifications, the manager asked them to take a test. When the results were in, both men had scored 19 out of 20.

The manager went to the makem and said, "Thank you for coming to the interview, but we’ve decided to give the geordie the job."

The makem said, "Why? We both got 19 questions correct. This being Sunderland and me being from Sunderland surely I should get the job."

The manager replied, "We have made our decision not on the correct answers, but on the question you got wrong."

The makem said, "And just how would one incorrect answer be better than another?"

The manager said, "Simple. On question number 7 the geordie wrote down, 'I don’t know.' You put down, 'Neither do I.'" 
From MadPriest. Who else?

Mozart on eloquence

To talk well and eloquently is a very great art, but that an equally great one is to know the right moment to stop.
- Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart
as quoted on Facebook

Better to love badly

I find that it is better to love badly and faultily than not to try and love at all. God does not have to have perfect instruments, and the Holy One can use our feeble and faltering attempts at love and transform them. My task is to keep on trying to love, to be faithful in my continuing attempt, not necessarily to be successful. The quality of my love may well be the most important element of my spiritual guidance.
- Morton T. Kelsey
from his book Companions on the Inner Way
as quoted on God's Politics

Finnish for foreigners

järki = reason, sense, intelligence
järjestää = organize
järjestelmä = organization
järjestelmällinen = organized
järjestelmällistyttää = organizationalize
epäjärjestelmällistyttää = unorganizationalize
epäjärjestelmällistyttämätön = antiunorganizationalized
epäjärjestelmällistyttämättömyys = antiunorganizationalization
epäjärjestelmällistyttämättomyydellä = with antiunorganizationalization
epäjärjestelmällistyttämättömyydellään = with his antiunorganizationalization
epäjärjestelmällistyttämättömyydelläänkö = is it with his antiunorganizationalization?
epäjärjestelmällistyttämättömyydelläänköhän = I wonder if it is possible, with his antiunorganizationalization?
epäjärjestelmällistyttämättömyydelläänköhänkään? = I wonder if it is possible, even with his antiunorganizationalization?

Seventeen syllables in one word - how about that? You just have to love that language!

MadPriest and the other cheek

Turning the other cheek because of personal cowardice is not what Jesus was on about. 

Walesa on peace and justice

In many parts of the world the people are searching for a solution which would link the two basic values: peace and justice. The two are like bread and salt for mankind.
- Lech Walesa
from his Nobel Lecture
as quoted on God's Politics

Churchill on rebuilding the world

If the Almighty were to rebuild the world and asked me for advice, I would have English Channels round every country. And the atmosphere would be such that anything which attempted to fly would be set on fire. 
- Sir Winston Churchill
as quoted on Child of Illusion